The Lonely Bird Up In The Tree

Still Missing You

I wish I could say good morning and good night
Or ask how you are
Or read a letter from you
Thank you for sending me our family history
I loved that flurry of letters to and fro
I read and reread your last letters to me
In July of last year
Must have read them a hundred times
And will read them one hundred times more
I want to pick up the phone and call your number
At home but you were seldom there
Because you were always at work
So I called you there
And it was late in the evening
The sound of delight in your voice at hearing mine
Made me forget why I called
So I just talked about this and that
And it was alright because
I just wanted to hear your voice too
You were busy
Yet you listened and laughed and giggled
Your voice filled with tenderness and kindness
So I lingered
I can hear your voice
Yes, I hear your voice
And I see your face now a faint smile
It aches my heart
I am not lonely
I do not like that word
Such a loser word
I am too busy
Life is too full to be lonely
I am too defiant to be lonely
But somewhere in my heart
There is sorrow
Overwhelming pain from missing you
And not just in mine
I miss you
I miss you
I just want to envelop you once more with my arms
How we love you so
Inday Ched said we must go on
She said you would want it that way
I just want to tell you that
I miss you so much
And I love you
Sometimes I feel like a child
Even though I know what to do
Must go on
I suppose
But the tears obscure my view
And blur my sight
Now I know why that with all the things I could have had
When Mother left
I only wanted her handkerchief
To wipe my tears away
I shall remember the smile in your face
The day I learned to cook
I miss you
I love you

Gallery - Behance -  Facebook

The Lonely Bird (if you can see it). I do not like the word "lonely." I find it most undesirable of all emotional states. I would rather be filled with sorrow or sadness than feel lonely which is not the same as being alone or solitude which I adore. My personal computer has a new operating system - Mountain Lion. Hurrah! Turns out that not everything that worked perfectly with Snow Leopard which made my life easy, are compatible with Mountain Lion. It made obsolete all Power PC applications and has no current flash player to run in Safari. Therefore I have to watch videos using the windows platform via Chrome. Worst of all, I lost my printer and scanner. What to do? Buy new printer and scanner of course which I have not done so. But as Ces, I should make the most of it, right? Right. Since I can't scan anyway, I started drawing on even larger Bristol Boards and Paris Paper, at least 14"x17". The only way for me to capture these images for now is through photographs just like the above image.


Rick Forrestal said...

I agree with you on "loneliness." (Ugh.)
I really like this piece, but for the life of me, I cannot find
the lonely bird.
I do like the stability and reach of this tree's roots.
Comforting . . .

k.h.whitaker said...

Found him! He does look lonely, so small among-st all that foliage. Hmmm, my daughter is upgrading my OS this weekend. I wonder if it will cause disruptions.

Creations By Mit said...

I loved examining the detail of this piece until I found him! I especially like the leaves.....I agree with you on "loneliness" - such a huge difference between that & solitude, which I enjoy. I've experienced quite a bit of both over the past 10 years....As for the challenge - I like to make people smile with my work, & this was a tough topic to do so. Sorry about the havok your upgrade wreaked!!

audrey said...

This drawing is beautiful, Ces. It depicts sadness in a beautiful way. I loved reading "Still Missing You". I understand your internal pain so well. I cannot imagine not missing my brother. I still talk to him and I know he hears me. If I think about him too long and too hard, tears begin to fall. I would give anything to hear him laugh. Yes, life goes on, but our hearts are filled with the voice and image of our loved ones.
I hope your summer has been a good one. Mine has been too busy ~ I yearn for some quiet time. I would like to sit under the tree in your drawing. ♥ audrey

Tammie Lee said...

it took me a while, but i did find the bird
such a wonderful piece
i love the roots wandering and the branches reaching
the walk that is happening
lonely is a rare feeling for me
usually it happens in crowds of people
i feel you love and missing.... makes sense to me

hedwig said...

The bird is very small but I found it! I think the tree is standing there very lonely too, but strong and with his roots firmly spread. For me the tree is symbol for strengh and endurance. I hope the missing will heal a bit, get softer. Perhaps in times of sadness we have to look for a tree with big branches, to hold on to and to seek shelter.

Päivi said...

I noticed this from the stream of images at once. It's very detailed but still says a lot with its simplicity.

Laura G. Young said...

Ah, another amazing tree illo! I am in continuing awe of your unique style. (And I'd not heard that the new OS would make Power PC apps obsolete. How frustrating.)

Steve E said...

Ces...the momma and her chicks (and so much more!) at top of page
is a MASTERPIECE! Truly so!

As are also you words below that, which are not your words...
rather inspired than perspired, your words show me God.
LOVE, the most powerful force; and you have captured it
in simple words, from your heart--from the depths of your

Also I love the tree, and the
lonely little bird
Jonathan Livingston Seagull
stopping for a rest?
In a tree.
Home for the weary

Steve E said...

Yessss, of course, I 'see' the bird, so lonely,
wishing it were simply alone.
It does not look lonely to me.
I want to fly in there on
next branch...and disturb its solitude.
Ain't I MEAN!?--grin!

Kathie Brown said...

So sorry for your sadness. I love the poem though, and the drawing of the tree.

Amalia K said...

Your words are like a cloud of intense emotions that muffled all sounds around me. I can feel your pain, Ces. Like anyone who has lost someone so dear. I can only say I'm glad you have such incredible talent to help you relieve the pain.

Hugs and kisses.

Rod MacGregor said...

The tree is magnificent...I like the roots in particular...and yes I did look and found the bird!!
Ces your'e a true Artist with words as well!

Wall Art Pictures said...

This is something what you can not define in words but still i would say incredible!!!! So happy to be catching up with all of your exploits!