Start Anew

I spent a lot of time on the drawing on the left but every time I worked on it, I kept thinking that it isn't just right. Yet I kept on going because I have fallen in love with the house. It is the focal point of the entire illustration. Yesterday evening, I finally decided to start a new illustration. I used the drawing on the left to guide me through the  new drawing. Then something strange happened. I kept going back to the old drawing and worked on it simultaneously.

When do you decide to abandon or set aside something on which you have invested, spent a lot of time and energy and at one point love? When your heart in not in it and the joy has dissipated.  Do not be afraid to move on and start anew. This could be just about anything; a project, job, task,  relationship, marriage, trip, planned vacation...etc. One thing you have to remember though is that this decision may be temporary or permanent. A drawing, for example is something to which you can return, but in a relationship that may not be possible. So, prioritize and think it through. If it is a drawing, it's simple. Relationships may need more pondering but do not brood, go on!

Relationships, marriages or friendships are not like drawings. When you decide to end them, you have to be prepared to accept the fact that you may never be able to go back. For years, my friend's in-laws have worked together everyday. The couple have been married for over forty years. He was a physician and she managed his clinic. When he retired at age 75, his wife divorced him. Everyone was shocked, including her husband. I was not. Perhaps she stayed on to help him and when she no longer felt that he did not need her, she was free to go. My friend said that their marriage was more than that. I replied that perhaps it may have looked that way but the husband may have taken things for granted and thought that his wife will always be there. I, on the other hand, thought that perhaps his wife wanted to leave a long time ago but felt compelled to stay out of duty. Now the husband is lonely and the wife hates and despises him. I told my friend that perhaps if she left sooner, the hatred may have not brewed and early liberation may have set them both free, but she was duty-bound. Now that the children are adults and successful she was free to go. More likely, love left first or perhaps love was never there. It was an arranged marriage. 

Life is so precious to waste.


Tammie Lee said...

perhaps the hate she feels for him
is misplaced hate for herself for staying as long as she did.
if so, when she comes to terms with that, her hate for him will fall away and she will truly feel free. at least that is what i have experienced at times.

yes life is precious
both drawings are amazing to me
lovely Sunday to you~

Ces Adorio said...

Oh Tammie, I did not think of that but now that you mentioned it, perhaps. I think couples sometimes are pressured into staying with each other out of duty, social pressure and strong cultural expectations, etc. That is a great insight. I hope you are well and a lovely Sunday to you too.

Rick Forrestal said...

Fascinating transition . . .

Bella Sinclair said...

That is a very sad story. So much disruption so late in life. I hope all involved can resolve their feelings relatively quickly so that they don't have to spend many of their remaining years in bitterness and loneliness.

Your drawing! Hahaha, it should not surprise me that you kept returning to the original. They are both so much fun! There are a lot of happy memories embedded in there. :)