Refrain

Oak Leaves. Permanent ink on 3.5x2.5 inch 40% cotton paper.

Seasons

I leave thee just
As seasons
Come and go
As Earth pleases
Existence.
Hot, humid, dry, arid
The ground breaks
Tempers released
Drought brings
Petrichor!
Breezy, chilly, dark, grey
Ablaze in colors
Fiery beauty
Silent death.
Frigid, cold, icy
So bleak yet white and pure
Sunny, bright, mellow
Slow.
Washes away grim
An acorn pushes itself from the ground
A little oak tree
Free.
Buying time.


I remain.

Sprout. Matted ATC sized permanent pigment ink in 40% cotton paper.

The above, is a poem I originally wrote for the Season Series, a collection of pigment ink drawings on Bristol Board. It was my first serious attempt to draw in pen and ink as I was purely an oil painter at that time.

Off to Party

We are going to Deborah's Cantina Party.

We are bringing along this passed-out drunk we found at the park.

Nuts For A Great Cause!!!

How To Be Surrounded By Nuts Without Cracking Up

I am treading dangerous territory here. I am talking about nuts and cracking up. Not good. Not good at all. It's time to go away, for a good while. I will be busy balancing, undoing, recharging, prioritizing, getting massages and back rubs. I have said that before, haven't I?

I am creating some original artwork (drawings) and also making limited edition prints to donate to the Susan G. Komen Foundation for their charity auction this fall. I am inviting my artist friends, if you would like to contribute, think about how you can help. No new tasks, you may donate signed prints of your artwork, one or two. If you are interested, please send me an email and I will send you the information, including tax credit forms, donation forms, contacts, etc. It's a great cause. Think about it. The catalog will be released on September 30th, so it will be nice if can send your contributions by September 1st. Have a great summer!!!

For Hire - Layout Editor

You know what I always wanted to be?

A Lay-out Editor. During my pre-nursing year, I was one of the editors of our college paper. I wanted to be THE lay-out editor, instead they asked me to write articles and columns, which I hated. I was very opinionated, which quite surprisingly earned me many followers and gave me a reputation. Yet, I hated writing, I wanted to do the lay-out. The Editor-in-chief refused. So I worked myself out of a job, missed my deadlines, yet they did not let me go. I was assigned to interview THE college campus personality and instead I asked her about what she thought of the political climate, we were under martial law at that time. She obliged. It was the best interview, I think, she was a very intelligent beautiful young woman and had a lot on her mind. The editor-in-chief sent another writer to re-interview her about her favorite color, movies, likes, dislikes...total folderol! The editor-in-chief and I were friends so I told her, I was very busy and could no longer continue.

So I am now playing lay-out editor when I should be getting ready for work...

Blemished

Blemished. I never thought a blemished leaf would spark my interest, but there it is! All drawings were rendered with colored permanent pigment ink on 12"x9" Bristol Boards. I look at these drawings now, and I see great room for improvement.

There is something poignant about these leaves. I find myself comparing my life to their state. When once they were young leaf sprouts and then evergreen with lustre, they are now blemished, tattered and torn.

I frequently use trees in metaphor. The symbolism, so apt. If I were an oak, I would like to be a Shumard, handsome, straight, tall, fine lines in the trunk, very difficult to climb unlike the live oak; not the most utilitarian of oaks, like the turkey, shingle, black, white or cork oaks for example; blazing during its peak, yet relegated to geographical areas that do not allow it to display its full brilliance, in the cities, for example where it does its best to show its true color but is stifled by the heat. And so it does its best, provide a beautiful shade.

So true is my life compared to a tree. Deep roots that anchor me, my family, my parents, brothers and sisters; strong trunk, that helps me sustain the fury and make me evolve, My Viking. Then there are my branches which are my epsilons and more branches which shall remain with me until I fall down, my true friends that make my life richer and fuller. And then there are the leaves that beautify and fill me, they are my acquaintances that come and go with the seasons and then my acorns, hopefully, the work that I do that will go on and enrich others' lives.

Why am I talking about trees? A tree is a tree, right? Yet trees succumb to wear and tear, to rot and diseases. Soon trees fall. That is why, The Viking and I call a tree service to maintain the only tall tree we have on our yard. Heck, yes, we spend a lot of money getting it professionally trimmed in preparation for the hurricane season and when the branches touch our neighbors' roofs. Alas, I am not a tree!

I have decisions to make. For now, I want my blog friends to check out my gallery blog. It may be the only blog I will be updating for a while. I am the sort that lunges head on and intensely on any activity I do. I do not like to leave anything that has my name, open and unattended. I will still keep this blog, for posterity and update it now and then. But I want to keep it private. So if you want to continue reading this blog, please email me so I can send you an invitation, unless I already have your email address. I love this blog. It records some of the best things that happened in my life, especially on August 2008, when I started drawing leaves in pen and ink. I hope to make it public in the near future.

Meanwhile, I will dedicate my time to face the lousy doctor's report that I received in the mail yesterday. It is making me very angry at myself. I am also concerned. It is something that needs my attention. For a very long time, I led a very unbalanced life: too much work, too much art, too much of this and that, too much headaches, too much rushing and hurrying, too many deadlines, long work stretches, skipping routine doctor's visits, too much stress... you get my drift? I need to do some balancing act!

Launch!

Launch! 6th in a series of oil paintings on 30 inches x 40 inches gallery-stretched canvas

Thank you, to all of you wonderful sisterfriends, friends and visitors. I had planned to return in September but judging from the comment count of my summer-break post, I thought I better punctuate my hiatus and save you from scrolling to the bottom of the comment box. HAHAHA!

I remain busy with work, family activities, parental responsibilities, community volunteer activities, getting in touch with friends, socializing and Farmville on Facebook, yes, I do have a vice, delightfully so. I am a simple farmer in Farmville. I want to convert my farm into an orchard so I don't have to schedule my activities around the harvests. Right now, I am planting crops to earn money to buy more trees… but I digress.

Here's the scoop. I have been traveling on a frequency of joy, love, happiness, hope and gratitude. I am inspired and energized. I laugh a lot, I rejoice. I find myself giving thanks everyday. I am filled with hope. Painting after painting, drawing after drawing, every squiggle, every line has been inspired by virtue. I travel in a wavelength surrounded by the people I love and who love me in return. My family, my friends, my sisterfriends are my refuge. My journey is not without struggles but nothing is insurmountable while I keep the faith and hope and reach out to supportive and loving arms.

Middle age is tough, tougher still when it is accompanied with the responsibility of raising very strong-willed and independent-minded teenagers. It has been a learning experience for me. My eyes are open but more especially my heart and my mind. It has been a roller coaster of emotions - joy, laughter, anguish, tears followed by more joy and laughter. My heart has been beating wildly, my mind stretched beyond its limits. I discover the depths of love is bottomless and the ties that bind me are strong, elastic and unbreakable.

My son is a beautiful, sensitive, loving and smart teenager, doing his best to grow up to be a man. I see how difficult it is to be a boy in this society. The pressures, the influences, the demands and expectations. As a young boy, I called my son Eagle Eye. He was keen, astute, observant, intense and sensitive. He saw what I could not see sometimes and found what I lost. Someday soon he will soar. He is hurriedly scratching to take off. In the meantime, he is pushing my capacity to love, understand and forgive. He slows down sometimes. I am confident he will find his way, guided by the love and care that his father and I bestow. He has a most loving sister. He loves his family. He adores his family. I always liked him when he was a boy. I was always very proud of him, I am proud of him. He is well loved and liked by everyone who meets him. He is a rather neat young man. I look at him and I am overcome with love. Being his mother is the toughest job for me. I love him so. The responsibility is mine and My Viking's to launch this epsilon to a well grounded path of happy, productive adulthood. We love him so.

How do I cope? Terribly, sometimes! There are periods when I think I have reached bottom only to be pushed even lower. What lifts me up so I can join his father in hoisting him? It is our love for each other. If I have never expressed my true love and gratitude for my husband, I do now. I love him dearly, terribly, intensely. He is my strong oak, dependable, unbreakable. I am blessed. I love My Viking so much. I will be lost without him. A son needs a father! A good father. On this account, my son is blessed.

Ah, when I was born, the angels were delighted. I somehow always believed that. They assigned me to a most loving and intellectually gifted family. I cannot say enough about my parents, my brothers and sisters. However, what I did not know, is that I must have done something awesomely wonderful, for I have been gifted with sisterfriends, who time and time again, push, pull, lift and carry when I am down or stuck. How many times have your voices soothed me, your love comforted me, your wisdom guided me and your humor made me remember to laugh and smile? I love you so very much. I love you. I am so blessed. I am filled with gratitude. You are my Scarlet Fiesta in the forest!

Motherhood is a challenge, a responsibility, a privilege and an honor.

I believe in the Law of Attraction. People of the same virtues, qualities and characteristics attract each other. Those meetings that do not last are temporary trips and stumbles. Look around, aren't we a blessed bunch?

Thank you!

UPDATE: Friday, July 23, 2010
I deleted Farmville last night. I recycled my trees, crops, plants...
Quite franfkly, I am so relieved.
Thank you, Bella, for the intervention!
HAHAHAHA!

A Walk... Updated!!!

VACATION!!!
VACATION!!!
VACATION!!!
I WISH!!!

FRYDAY
June 15, 2010

I am fine! I am fine! We are all fine. I have a major project with a strict timeline . I am just very busy with work, art, friends and especially spending more time with my family because the children are home for the summer. I am painting on the weekends, drawing and playing on the weekdays after work. I am also busy "farming" (HAHAHAHA!)

See my new toy below:

The Mahl bridge!!!

It finally arrived today. I am eager to try it tomorrow, just in time for some detailed work. If you want to know more about the Mahl Bridge, check out this video.

A Walk In The Woods With Chops And Ruff, Looking For Snowflake. Permanent pigment ink on 9"x12" Bristol Board.
Double click image to enlarge details.

I won't be here for a while. I don't know when, but I shall return as soon I am able. I have said so many times that I will take a break and then returned a few days later. And so my farewells were sort of a coffee break. Now, I have to tend to things. Summer is very busy for us. Sometimes, I feel my time does not belong to me. I am not even going on vacation. There are things that need my undivided attention and therefore I did not want something that I enjoy doing, become a burden. When time finds me idle and in front of a computer, I may manage to drop by and say hello. That indeed, would be a treat for me. And so, as much as I like blogging and sharing my art with you, I will take leave for now. I did not want you to wonder. Have a safe and wonderful summer. I bid you leave with this fantastic violin concierto:

Saint-Saens, Introducion et Rondo Capriccioso

A Very Special Day

Detail of "The Launch," in progress. Oil on canvas. 30" x 40" gallery stretched canvas. Part of the ongoing Fiesta series. In our family, we don't kick out teenagers, although sometimes the idea enters my mind. In our family we launch teenagers into adulthood. I may have been naive to think that love is enough.

Today is a very special day, not just because I am blogging even though I have said I will be away. I will really be busy for the next two months but I just had to sneak in here to celebrate this day.

My mother is a Mother with a capital M.

While I struggle with my own inadequate mothering skills, as I and The Viking launch our first epsilon into the world of grown ups, I want to thank my Mother for successfully launching eight epsilons and for putting up with all my difficult and undesirable ways and guiding me, when I was a teenager. She and my Father, raised children through wars, economic crises, government graft and corruption, a society that treats women generally as servile and expects them to be subservient, a geography riddled with calamities and disasters. They managed to equally raise my siblings and me to actualize our potential and make ourselves productive.

Thank you dearest Nanay. How I cry for you sometimes.

Today is my Mother's birthday.

Happy Birthday, Nanay! Thank you for my blessed and beautiful childhood and launch.

Love Works

Calumet, the Cheerful. From "The Illustrated Abecedarian"
For Illustration Friday's "Giant" theme.

Miniature squiggles.
Giant love.


Addendum:

The trumpet sounds on this song "All The Things You Are" sung by Ella Fitzgerald remind me of a herd of elephants. I Love this song. I used to dance to this song when the children were newborns. I would cradle them in my arms and gently swing to this song. I sometimes cried and the tears would fall on their faces. That was a long time ago.